Heat
January16
The sun burned down on me in fiery bundles. It blinded anyone who dared to look up. Sweat rushed down my face in wave like ripples.
We were winning the game and I was playing good, I had even scored, but-
The heat. Oh the undeniable heat. It felt like a massive fire god was throwing hundreds of fire balls down on me—making me feel like I was melting into a human-sized puddle on the ground.
By the end of the game “heat” had turned my face as pink as Cotten candy—and the slightest touch to the skin sent a burning sensation through my whole body.
We ended up winning the game—but I will never forget how hot it was that day. The heat literally burned itself into my memory forever.
Love the strong imagery in this, all the more powerful for the way you used your paragraphing, sentence structure, and punctuation as tools to underscore the intensity of the heat. Effective use of repetition, too!
I really like the introduction. It hooked me in on the first sentence.
I like the introduction and all that imagery, and I really enjoy that last sentence- excellent metaphor.